Hesitation.
Its been so long ever since this problem arises, and not a day did i ever felt peaceful or joyful.
Today, met up with the usual 2. I just couldn't get into the mood of fun. The painful ordeal that seems almost took up my life. I just kept thinking of this problem, about how to solve it. Whenever i try to do it, it just feels like being shot another time. Cos i would just keep thinking of how to solve this. Then 2 nights ago, thought it would be good if i just leave the church, so i wun keep getting myself entangled.
But yesterday, tanna told me about the consequences, then i really dunno wat to do already. Then when i was at home, i thought about how God has brought me through my 'o' levels last year. That just reminds me of how indebted i am to God. Even giving His life up for me. Then God told me if i were to leave he would be so upset with me. He didn't bring me back for nothing, to just serve for half a year, what he wants me to do is to just get on with whatever he wants me to do, and stop thinking about what had happen.
So for the time being, i would just stick to the current plan. I'll not return till i really understand what God wants me to do for the ministry.
